Teaching For Dummies
>TEACHER : Maria, go to the map and find North America.
> MARIA : Here it is!
> TEACHER : Correct. Now class, who discovered America?
> CLASS : Maria!
> __________________________________________________ _________
>
>TEACHER : Why are you late, Frank?
> FRANK : Because of the sign.
> TEACHER : What sign?
> FRANK : The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."
> __________________________________________________ _________
> TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
> JOHN : You told me to do it without using tables!
> __________________________________________________ _________
>
> TEACHER : Glenn, how do you spell "crocodile?"
> GLENN : K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L"
> TEACHER : No, that's wrong
> GLENN : Maybe it s wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!
> __________________________________________________ _________
> TEACHER : Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
> DONALD : H I J K L M N O!!
> TEACHER : What are you talking about?
> DONALD : Yesterday you said it's H to O!
> __________________________________________________ _________
>
> TEACHER : Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we
>didn't have ten years ago.
> WINNIE : Me!
> __________________________________________________ _________
> TEACHER : Goss, why do you always get so dirty?
> GOSS : Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
>
> __________________________________________________ _________
> TEACHER : Millie, give me a sentence starting with "I."
> MILLIE : I is...
> TEACHER : No, Millie..... Always say, "I am."
> MILLIE : All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
> __________________________________________________ _________
> TEACHER : Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?
> TINO: Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day, same time."
> __________________________________________________ _________
> TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry
>tree, but also admitted doing it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father
> didn't punish him?"
> LOUIS : Because George still had the ax in his hand.
> __________________________________________________ _________
> TEACHER : Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before
>eating?
> SIMON : No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
> __________________________________________________ _________
> TEACHER : Clyde, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as
> your brother's. Did you copy his?
> CLYDE : No, teacher, it's the same dog!;
>_________________________________________________ _ ________
>TEACHER : Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when
>people are no longer interested?
> HAROLD : A teacher.
...posted as received...
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