weddings in yemen

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In wedding ceremonies people gather* entertaining beauty of happy songs to add more joy to the occasion. File photo

Wedding ceremonies in Yemen are not much different from those of other Arab countries* particularly those of tribal and rural areas.
Nonetheless* marriage ceremonies in Yemen differ from one area to another. In the northern parts of Yemen the man pays the costs of marriage ceremonies; he pays the dowry* prepares and furnishes the house* and takes care of the wedding banquet. In southern areas* the bride takes to her husband’s house all that she’d need (e.g.) bedroom furniture* kitchenware.
Here* we will take an overall look at a particular side of these wedding: the social side. In such side* social solidarity becomes very obvious* where the groom entertains ten to three hundreds person for three continuous days.
Those guests usually come from nearby cities and villages* in addition to groom relatives who would take the hardship of traveling far distance to attend the wedding.
Usually* the groom’s neighbors help in preparing banquets for those guest* which is a strong social tradition called “Al-Garm.”
To alarm the neighbor of Al-Garm* the groom’s father go to the neighborhood chief who* in his turn* notify everyone in the neighborhood of the kind of food they should prepare like bread* sweets.
However* the responsibility of preparing of the banquet’s main meals* likes meats and broth* is the groom’s family’s. Those meals are usually prepared from the goats and cows that the groom’s guests bring along with them.
Al-Mizayn –servant- does the cooking part of those meals. Ash-Showa’ah* a group of the groom’s guests* have the duty of going to the brid’s house (or village) to accompany her procession to the groom’s house.
Even though* a lot of money is spent in such weddings* it is all ok as long as the wedding went on a way that’s up to the family or the tribe’s honor and nobility. That’s because weddings are looked at as important tribal festivals. Nonetheless* one can reduce the cost of wedding according to his financial ability* in some cases wedding would be limited to immediate family members and close friends.

Weddings in Sana’a
Weddings in Sana’a are looked at as a way to vie in glory with others* where the total cost reaches a million YR* more or less.
The wedding ceremonies usually starts with distributing wedding invitations* followed by “Lailat El-Hena” – night of Henna* for both the bride and the groom. In that night* guest must do “At-Tarh”* giving the groom amount of money each according to his ability.
At-Tarh could also be done after the wedding procession. During At-Tarh* the Mizayen collects the money for the groom* announcing the name of the giver using a traditional phrase that goes “ O’ groom* it is collected for you from so and so (giver’s name) the amount of…”
If the groom decided that there would be no banquet* just to save on the cost* then the night of Henna and A-Tarh won’t take place. Instead* the groom goes with his guests* in the early morning of the wedding day* to a traditional bathroom.
After finishing his bath* the groom and his guests head back to the his house where they eat their breakfast then they leave for a drive around the city (or to the close villages) accompanied by drummers. They perform different traditional dances till the lunch time* at which they head back to have their lunch.
Al-Magyal* sitting for chewing Qat* starts after lunch. During Al-Magyal* a chanter or a vocalist sings some chants* and attendees repeat after him* until 7 P.M. where people get ready for the wedding procession.
The ceremonies of the wedding procession in sana’a start with some traditional dances followed by the Zafah* actual wedding procession that lasts for an hour and a half to two hours.
During Azafah* the chanter sings some religious chants as the groom* carrying a sword* walks slowly from the start of the street* till he reaches his house doorsteps. The street is usually lit by special lamps and candles. Unusual habit is pricking with needles* as away to distract him during Azafah. Therefore family members should keep an eye on the groom at all times.
After Azafah* the groom asks permission to leave for his bride* as guests dance until from 10 P.M. till the dawn. As the groom arrives at the bride’s room* he sits next to her and juices and coffee served.
The next morning* dances are performed. And in the afternoon* the similar ceremonies are conducted just like the previous day.

Wedding ceremonies in Hadramout
In Shibam Hadramout* where we observed the traditional wedding ceremonies* the wedding starts with distributing wedding invitations* called “wikad”* by a group of people called “Abeed Jalwah”- servants - three days before the actual weeding takes place. Girls in Hadramout are considered children until they reach the age of nine. Once they reach that age* they wear Hijab – scarf- and they don’t meet with married men* except those of the immediate family.
Marriages in Hadramout are the type of arranged marriages. Parents of the groom and the bride agreed on marriage date and they pay “Gobaz”- dowary* which is defined by 1920 personal status law.
The Gobaz is usually put in a perfumed handkerchief* then it is put in a box called “Sundoq Al-Gobaz”- dowry box. The people witnessing the event open the box and congratulate both parties wishing them a blessed marriage. Attendees who couldn’t see the Gobaz* can not attend the wedding.
The wedding lasts for four days* regardless to the family financial situation. Eight days before the wedding day* the families of the groom and the bride get together in a previously set appointment called “Qahwa.” During the Qahwa* mixed nuts are served with coffee that is prepared by the groom.
After the Qahwa* the marriage contract is signed and the groom’s family moves the “marriage furniture” out the couple’s house. The furniture consists of:
1- A small wooden box called “botya” that contains incense* saffron* fragrant soup and so fragrances.
2- A clothes box made of teak wood that contains a prayer dress* four pillows and other things that are considered to be a help to the groom.
In the second day* the bride comes back to her family* even though the groom’s family’s insistence on her to stay. When she arrives at her father’s house* she heads toward a room* where her father is awaiting her.
The father then puts a long veil on her saying: “ In the name of Allah* the merciful You are the wife of so and so (groom’s name). After that he takes his daughter to women’s room. During that* the family of the groom watches closely the bride’s actions; if she stays calm* than that’s an indication of her decency. If she shows her joy in a very noticeable way* that would indicate her indecency.

Lailat El-Haky
In the night of El-haky* they take the brid to traditional bathroom where she is giving a bath. Then they take her to the divan of women* as her face is covered with a black veil with beautiful variegations called “ Moqana’ Elhena.”
Four women start applying henna designs on the bride’s hands and feets. Meanwhile* in the groom’s house* the drums are beaten and groom is taken to the bride’s house* while Henna is still in his hand. After that* groom is taken back to his house to wash off the henna* which is applied in design like it is with the bride* of his feet and hands.
The next day is called “Al-Mashti.” In Al-Mashti* ceremonies start at a very early hour* where bride is given another bath before the drummers arrive. Coffee is served in this day* then more henna is applied to bride’s hands and feet. The guests leave when the henna session is done with* just to come back at lunch time carrying At-Tarh and gifts.
The bride’s family brings a censer* while one of the bride’s little brother or sister cuts the bride’s hair from the front and the back. After having lunch* the bride’s guests head to the groom’s house. At night* entertainments are performed while serving coffee to attendees. [/SIZE]